I'm Not Your Late Night Booty Call

So...everyone knows me and Rey broke up right? Ok, cuz on one hand, people are super suprised, and on the other hand, people are super excited. wtf? excited? who are these people. I really just need time to chill and have guys leave me alone. the only guys i can handle are my main guys, there's a couple of em that are just always there for me, so all the other ones can go jump off a bridge. :] safely as possible.

I sound so angry, i'm not, hahaha. i'm actually really happy, i just noticed these random creepy guys myspacing me, and then this one kid that is kinda weird at my school. so otherwise i'm actually just exaggerating....isn't it wizard?

The End

Love Like That.

I want a love. A precious love that comes only from two hearts beating to the same beat. I want a love where both people are completely themselves, and have nothing to hide. A love where you can be silly and laugh about nothing. A love where you can express yourself and be mad if you need to be. A love where i can be me, and have him love me no matter what. I want a love where you're brashly proud to be loved by this person. Where you can do nothing and have a ball.

I want this, and people get mad when i end relationships for my own reasons, if it's not working out, i'm gonna end it, sorry. I love to meet people, and date, but for the love of everything good and holy can i just have fun, not everything has to be serious, i am to young to be serious, i don't wanna find the one i'm supposed to be with, i want him to jump outta no where and take me by suprise, even if he's been there all along. Who knows? These are things i want to figure themselve's out. Thank you very much, and when they do, i'll be ready for them, which i clearly am not.

Life is for living, and that's what i plan on doing.

Poker Face

How "Spot On" did Lady GaGa get with this song? Seriously, her metaphor is brilliant. Every woman has a "poker face" persay. We all, as the female sex use some form of coy to lure in the men, which isn't always a bad thing, but it's a dangerous game to play, because you could lose everything. Hearts aren't simple things, they're not meant to be broken, and yet it seems, that's all that's happening. Women have such a powerful tool, or influence on decisions men make, and it's easy for them. Just, understand how men work and apply your poker face and Miss, you have all the power you need. Women use this however they want, and rarely let men see beneath their "poker face."

Poker faces work two ways, one, to be used as a lure only, and be discarded as soon as they have their man, and two, to be used as a lure, a tease, a coy, and to keep going to keep men interested to the highest extreme, as soon as the chips fall, she's gone, and the man is kept dreaming.

Dangerous, tactful, useful, and powerful. All women have them, just not all of them are aware.

The Emotional Bonds Are Broken

This Liberating feeling is new and suprising. I can move in my own skin with confidence for the first time in a long time. I feel like there's a part of me that's changing and i'm not sure what it is yet, but i am sure it will come in time. I don't even care, as long as i feel like this i could do anything and laugh about it. There's a change inside me that i can't explain, it's the equivilent to stretching out on the warm summer carpet, when the sun rays come through the window and hit your face, its so relaxing and sweet that you laugh. I'm laughing people, and i don't plan on stopping. "the world is a playground, we know it when we're kids, just somewhere along the way we forget it"

I like this. I'll fight for it. I won't give it up. No one can take it from me, I don't need anyone to make me happy. I make me happy. and i'm confident in that. i don't need no man.

The Conspiracy That Is Men And Women

Let's Face It. Women and Men are completely different. We all know that. Men have one track minds, while women on the other hand can drive, talk on the phone, put their shoes on, order fast food, and think about what she needs to pack for her trip this weekend.

Men are supposed to be the pursuers, they're supposed to make the first move, make the first call, do the first everything. Yet, it seems like they don't always get that, sometimes they need a little motivation, which is quite annoying since it's predetermined that it's their job in the first place.

Women are supposed to be the sweet ones, very ladylike, and a little air-headed. She's supposed to make eye-contact then quickly look away, be polite, calm, peaceful, and wooed. Yet, it seems like they don't always do that. Women now-a-days are found to be more brash, outgoing, commanding, and powerful. They are more often making the moves, and taking control, leaving the men to grow accustomed to the women also making the first move, or splitting for dinner, or calling first.

All this is fine, and was bound to happen, but then we have those situations where the guy makes the move for his gain, and the woman puts her heart into his facade. She is left to pull petals off of flowers, relying on a small chance that the petals will land how she wishes, and that they'll actually have any effect on whether or not the guy will follow through with the "loves me." Most likely he'll end up another "loves me not" in a pile of petals that keeps growing with broken hopes, wasted nights by the silent telephone, and withered faith.

All I'm saying is that men need to do their pre-determined part and women need to not get their hopes up on every Tom, Dick, and Harry.

You'd Honestly Think We Were Smarter, Wouldn't You?

Idiots in Fact


Alrighty Then. :] You'd think that we wouldn't take pictures while i'm driving when i'd been in two accidents that day, but...alas, pictures for myspace are more important than our well being, and don't argue about it with us, because we're ALWAYS CAREFUL, obviously. haha



But seriously, we should probably be concerned, and you should too, because we need to sort out our priorities. Majorly. :]

Fitty Thangs

Fifty things that make me, me. No Specific order, they're people, places, things, experiences, etc. So. here goes. [whew]

1. Kujo - my poor dead dog...he was a dream come true and now he's gone. :[

2. Journaling - because it helps me get my thoughts out and review my life.

3. Kristi Critser - because she keeps me grounded and sane. i wouldn't be the same with out

her. 4. Myspace - what else would i do with my spare time? or my entire life?

5. KFC - because now every other job is like heaven.

6. Primos - because my preffered tastes have changed and expanded for the better.

7. Trampolines - i don't think i'd be as quirky as if i'd never had that concussion. :]

8. Kody Hansen - because he changed my heart. I've never been the same, i'm careful with my heart now, and not with other's.

9. Root Beer Barrels - because if i'd never been caught, i'd have been a liar my whole life.

10. Miko - i'd be SOOOO mormon without you.

11. Ms. Jessica T. - You changed my look of best friends, and showed me new worlds.

12. Joey Zamudio - never breaks traditions.

13. Warts - When i was younger, because i needed more to be concious about. ha.

14. Dogs - my first love, i've never loved deeply since.

15. Super Bad - First Bad movie EVER, and i've gone down hill since. Bravo. :]

16. Danielle Dean - She's an example, always in the back of my mind, to be kind to others.

17. Haunted World - Scarred shitless never felt so good. :]

18. Thomas Newby - i like to be open minded and stubborn thank you. :]

19. Daddy - because he teaches me things most people don't even know about.

20. ma - because who else would be so funny without even knowing it?

21. Kyle - we're so alike and such a bane to each other..but i love him sooo much

22. Sarah - i've wanted to wear slippers outside since.

23. Shantel - if we weren't sisters we wouldn't be friends. so i'm glad we're sisters :]
completely

24. Tom - because i'd be lucky to marry someone even a tenth as amazing as Tom.

25. Bradley - i needed someone to be my friend when i was so much younger. :[

26. Paulina - I've never laughed so hard in all of my life

27. Charlie - I've never loved a child so much. :]

28. Phone - because i love being able to communicate quickly and efficiently :]

29. Lagoon - the place i've had the most, best times.

30. Crying - because my soul needs some way to be cleansed.

31. Jonathon Robert Monasterio - How many heartaches and good times will it take? hopefully
endless amounts.

32. Debonair - oh how we attempted. he he...it changed our outlook on productivity and

time crunches. :]

33. Gum - an extra boost of self confidence.

34. Music - Because it's my world, it helps me feel better about things, and helps me get

through the hard times. I seriously don't know where i'd be without music.

35. Relationships - because i've had one for every year i've been alive...and more, it's starting to get ridiculous, but that's how we grow, and learn who's perfect for us.

36. Win a Date With Tad Hamilton - Because it taught me to be careful who i think i'm falling

in love with, when my real true love might actually be close by.

37. Mormon - because i'd have nothing to believe and hold on to without it.
38. Amelia - fatty, is the closest thing to a sister i have...besides my actual sisters.

39. Melissa - I'd still play king of the bed, or Daemons with you anyday, i love you guys that
much. <3>

40. Emmmmy - you've changed the way i think about things, i try to always be positive and just have fun. :] thanks.

41. Gerard - Because he keeps me safe on the roads. we've had many adventures. :]

[cept he's green and legit]

42. Gerard Way - Whew baby, i'd ball my eyes out if we ever met, he's inspired me so much.

43. Hannah Havoc - never met, but her photography inspires me.

44. Photo Impression - i never would have realized what i reallly wanted to do with my life with out it.

43. Melanie - Because she's always there for me, and she'll hold me when i cry.

44. Edwards - the first job i actually love <3

44. Bailey Karen - because she is someone who i love and worry about.

45. Romeo and Juliet - true love never dies, and i'll never forget it, or want anything more than a love as pure as their's. 46. Acting - it's curious to be someone you're not, and have it be ok, it's my drug, i can't get enough.

47. Just Married - Never gets old, and i will love that movie till the day i die.

48. Boys - Because i would not be the same with out them, relationships, friends, heartaches.

49. Peach Smoothies - like sucking a peach through a straw, it's fantastic, and has changed my life forever...:]]]]]]

50. Cutting Hair - I've never felt so good as when knowing "i can do that" and i can make it how i want it. gives me control. creepy, at least i don't cut MYSELF !

The End, these are simply just a FEW things that make me, me, but it's a start, it's interesting to see where i've been influenced by small things....

you do one now. :]